A Peggie tip for lost lambs: Please stroll down to access page!
It's Time for Tickles 'n Truth 
A Fun, Faith 'n Funny Bone Feature
"Funny Bone Faith" sees humor--AND faith--in the tough times and with God's help, smiles through tears as it triumphs in a Lord who brings joy and laughter to our lives--daily! Enjoy the fun and inspiration--and strengthen YOUR "Funny Bone Faith" right here--today!
NOTE: Humor pieces are meant to be funny. No offense is meant with regard to age, sex, race, religion, occupation or any other topic. It is simply a way of laughing at ourselves, so please just laugh along with us!
I hate to be the one to defy sacred myth, but I believe he's a she.Think about it. Christmas is a big, organized, warm, fuzzy, nurturing social deal, and I have a tough time believing a guy could possibly pull it all off!
For starters, the vast majority of men don't even think about selecting gifts until Christmas Eve. It's as if they are all frozen in some kind of Ebenezerian Time Warp until 3 p.m. on Dec. 24th, when they--with amazing calm--call other errant men and plan for a last-minute shopping spree.
Once at the mall, they always seem surprised to find only Ronco products, socket wrench sets, and mood rings left on the shelves. (You might think this would send them into a fit of panic and guilt, but my husband tells me it's an enormous relief because it lessens the 11th hour decision-making burden.) On this count alone, I'm convinced Santa is a woman.
Surely, if he were a man, everyone in the universe would wake up Christmas morning to find a rotating musical Chia Pet under the tree, still in the bag.
Another problem for a he-Santa would be getting there. First of all, there would be no reindeer because they would all be dead, gutted, and strapped on to the rear bumper of the sleigh, amid wide-eyed, desperate claims that buck season had been extended. Blitzen's rack would already be on the way to the taxidermist.
Even if the male Santa DID have reindeer, he'd still have transportation problems because he would inevitably get lost up there in the snow and clouds and then refuse to stop and ask for directions.
Add to this the fact that there would be unavoidable delays in the chimney, where the Bob Vila-like Santa would stop to inspect and repoint bricks in the flue. He would also need to check for carbon monoxide fumes in every gas fireplace, and get under every Christmas tree that is crooked to straighten it to a perfectly upright 90-degree angle.
Other reasons why Santa can't possibly be a man:
~ Men can't pack a bag.
~ Men would rather be dead than caught wearing red velvet.
~ Men would feel their masculinity is threatened, having to be seen with all those elves. ~ Men don't answer their mail.
~ Men would refuse to allow their physique to be described even in jest as anything remotely resembling a "bowlful of jelly."
~ Men aren't interested in stockings unless somebody's wearing them.
~ Finally, being responsible for Christmas would require a commitment.
I can buy the fact that other mythical holiday characters are men. Father Time shows up once a year unshaven and looking ominous. Definite guy. Cupid flies around carrying weapons. Uncle Sam is a politician who likes to point fingers. Any one of these individuals could pass the testosterone-screening test. But not St. Nick. Not a chance.
--Selected from Mikey's Funnies.
"Christmas is for children,"
You've often heard it said,
With wonder in their shining eyes
And visions in their heads.
Christmas is for children,
With Santa and his sleigh;
With Christmas tree and holly
And laughter all the ay.
Christmas is for children
Rejoicing as they hear
The story of the Christ Child,
More precious every year.
Christmas is for children-
That's how it ought to be;
But I must be part little child
For Christmas is for me!
--by Ruth Martin. Used by permission.
"Peggie Breaks"--humor & inspiration links each month
For more daily humor:
Reverend Fun--A fun Christian cartoon of the day!
Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh List--a daily email humor list
Remember, there's nothing that can happen today
that you and your Lord together cannot handle!
Please
e-mail me to say hi.
All Scriptures are taken from the King James Version of the Holy Bible.
This Christian home has been visited a zillion times
since December 26, 1995!
Peggie's Personal Statement of Faith . . . The Peggie's Place Story & a Mission Statement
. . . 15 million and counting!
--It jogs around the world and around the clock--to find
YOU!
Well, not quite, but there HAS been a houseful--and
STILL room for one more--YOU!
The Christian Counter scans the entire site--and there's plenty of chocolate for everyone--so enjoy!
Most of the music playing at Peggie's Place originates from Songs of Praise.
Visit their great Web site to hear beautiful tunes by many talented artists. CDs are available.
Please note that while I strongly adhere to major tenets of the evangelical Christian faith, I may not personally agree with every specific doctrinal belief set forth in other Christian pages. I do want to provide a diversity of links and resource material for the entire Body of Christ to enjoy, and trust you will view it as such.A safety tip: Internet links and material may include other links and/or material which do not reflect my Christian views or yours. Please choose wisely and use with discretion! And if you find an ugly spider hiding in a dark corner, you may smash it with a broom from my BROOM CLOSET--I hate offensive stuff too!
Copyright 1996-2010 by Peggie C. Bohanon, Springfield, MO. All rights reserved.