Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young. We've got our whole
lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned-out
lightbulb?
Border Collie: Just one. And I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.
German Shepherd: I'll guard the lightbulb while you decide. Back off!
Dachshund: I can't reach the stupid light!
Toy Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border collie's ear and he'll do it. By the
time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.
Rottweiler: Go Ahead! Make me!
Shi-tzu: Puh-leeze, dah-ling. Leave it for the servants.
Lab: Oh, me, ME!!! Pleeeeeeze let ME change the bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh?
Can I?
Malamute: Let the Border collie do it. You can feed me while he's busy.
Chow Chow: I'm with the Malamute. After I take my nap that is!
Akita: I'm with the Chow and Malamute! What's for dinner?
Jack Russell Terrier or dalmatian : I can reach it! I just KNOW I can reach
it!
Another twenty jumps, and it's mine, ALL mine!!
Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.
Mastiff: Mastiffs are NOT afraid of the dark.
Basset Hound : ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb.
Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?
Kelpie: Put all the light bulbs in a little circle.
Pointer: I see it, there it is, rrrrriiiiiiight there.
--author unknown; found circulating the Net via email.
I saw him in the church building for the first time on Wednesday. He
was in his mid-70's, with thinning silver hair and a neat brown suit.
Many times in the past I had invited him to come. Several other
Christian friends had talked to him about the Lord and had tried to
share the good news with him.
He was a well-respected, honest man with so many characteristics a
Christian should have, but he had never put on Christ, nor entered
the doors of the church.
"Have you ever been to a church service in your life?" I had asked
him a few years ago. We had just finished a pleasant day of visiting
and talking.
He hesitated. Then with a bitter smile he told me of his childhood
experience some fifty years ago. He was one of many children in a
large impoverished family. His parents had struggled to provide food,
with little left for housing and clothing. When he was about ten,
some neighbors invited him to worship with them.
The Sunday School class had been very exciting! He had never heard
such songs and stories before!
He had never heard anyone read from the Bible! After class was over,
the teacher took him aside and said, "Son, please don't come again
dressed as you are now. We want to look our best when we come into
God's house."
He stood in his ragged, unpatched overalls. Then looking at his dirty
bare feet, he answered softly, "No, ma'am, I won't ever."
"And I never did," he said, abruptly ending our conversation.
There must have been other factors to have hardened him so, but this
experience formed a significant part of the bitterness in his heart.
I'm sure that Sunday School teacher meant well. But did she really
understand the love of Christ? Had she studied and accepted the
teachings found in the second chapter of James?
What if she had put her arms around the dirty, ragged little boy and
said, "Son, I am so glad you are here, and I hope you will come every
chance you get to hear more about Jesus."
I reflected on the awesome responsibility a teacher or pastor or a
parent has to welcome little ones in His name. How far reaching her
influence was!
I prayed that I might be ever open to the tenderness of a child's
heart, and that I might never fail to see beyond the appearance and
behavior of a child to the eternal possibilities within.
Yes, I saw him in the church house for the first time on Wednesday.
As I looked at that immaculately dressed old gentleman lying in his
casket, I thought of the little boy of long ago. I could almost hear
him say, "No, ma'am, I won't ever."
And I wept.
--Selected from God@Work newsletter, a ministry of St Mark's United Methodist Church, Lincoln Nebraska 68520.
A Fun, Faith 'n Funny Bone Feature 
