If you throw a cat out of the car window, does it become kitty litter?
If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?
Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon?
What do chickens think we taste like?
What do people in China call their good plates?
What do you call a male ladybug?
What hair color do they put on the driver's license of a bald man?
When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
Why are there Interstates in Hawaii?
Why are there flotation devices in the seats of planes instead of parachutes?
Why are cigarettes sold at gas stations where smoking is prohibited?
Have you ever imagined a world without hypothetical situations?
How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work?
If the 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why does it have locks on the door?
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes?
Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?
If a firefighter fights fire and a crime fighter fights crime, what does a freedom fighter fight?
If they squeeze olives to get olive oil, how do they get baby oil?
If you are driving at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, what happens?
Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of a drive-up ATM?
Why is it that when you transport something by car it is called shipment, but when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress? Ê
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
--Author unknown; found circulating the Net via email.
To the ARTIST He is the One Altogether Lovely.
To the ARCHITECT He is the Chief Corner Stone.
To the BAKER He is the Living Bread.
To the BANKER He is the Hidden Treasure.
To the BIOLOGIST He is the Life.
To the BUILDER He is the Sure Foundation.
To the CARPENTER He is the Door.
To the DOCTOR He is the Great Physician.
To the EDUCATOR He is the Great Teacher.
To the ENGINEER He is the New and Living Way.
To the FLORIST He is the Rose of Sharon and the Lily of the Valley.
To the GEOLOGIST He is the Rock of Ages.
To the HORTICULTURIST He is the True Vine.
To the JUDGE He is the Righteous Judge, Judge of All Men.
To the JEWELER He is the Pearl of Great Price.
To the LAWYER He is the Counselor, the Lawgiver, the Advocate.
To the NEWSPAPER He is the Good Tidings of Great Joy.
To the OCULIST He is the Light of the Eyes.
To the PHILANTHROPIST He is the Unspeakable Gift.
To the PHILOSOPHER He is the Wisdom of God.
To the PREACHER He is the Word of God.
To the SCULPTOR He is the Living Stone.
To the SERVANT He is the Good Master.
To the STATESMAN He is the Desire of All Nations.
To the STUDENT He is the Incarnate Truth.
To the THEOLOGIAN He is the Author and Finisher of our Faith.
To the TOILER He is the Giver of Rest.
To the SINNER He is the Lamb of God
that takes away the sins of the World.
To the CHRISTIAN He is the Son of the Living God,
the Savior, the Redeemer and the Lord!
--Author unknown.
Selected from God@Work newsletter. God@Work is a ministry of St Mark's United Methodist Church, 8550 Pioneers Blvd., Lincoln Nebraska 68520 U.S.A.
To Subscribe, send email to godatwork-subscribe@egroups.com
A Fun, Faith 'n Funny Bone Feature 
