Today's Tickles!

"Wacky Headlines from around the World"

~ March Planned For Next August
~ Blind Bishop Appointed To See
~ Lingerie Shipment Hijacked--Thief Gives Police The Slip
~ L.A. Voters Approve Urban Renewal By Landslide
~ Patient At Death's Door--Doctors Pull Him Through
~ Latin Course To Be Canceled--No Interest Among Students, Et Al.
~ Diaper Market Bottoms Out
~ Croupiers On Strike--Management: "No Big Deal"
~ Stadium Air Conditioning Fails--Fans Protest
~ Queen Mary Having Bottom Scraped
~ Women's Movement Called More Broad-Based
~ Teacher Strikes Idle Kids
~ Lawyers Give Poor Free Legal Advice
~ Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
~ Fund Set Up for Beating Victim's Kin
~ Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years
~ Cancer Society Honors Marlboro Man
~ Nicaragua Sets Goal to Wipe Out Literacy
~ Autos Killing 110 a Day--Let's Resolve to Do Better
~ 20-Year Friendship Ends at Altar
~ War Dims Hope For Peace
~ If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last A While
~ Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
~ Half of U.S. High Schools Require Some Study for Graduation
~ Blind Woman Gets New Kidney from Dad She Hasn't Seen in Years
~ Man is Fatally Slain
~ Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Experts Say
~ Death Causes Loneliness, Feelings of Isolation
~ Defendants Speech Ends in Long Sentence
~ Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
~ House Passes Gas Tax Onto Senate
~ Police Discover Crack in Australia
~ Stiff Opposition Expected to Casketless Funeral Plan
~ Many Antiques Seen at D.A.R. Meeting
~ William Kelly, 87, was Fed Secretary
~ Collegians are Turning to Vegetables
~ Scientists to Have Ford's Ear
~ Quarter of a Million Chinese Live on Water
~ Hershey Bars Protest
~ County Officials to Talk Rubbish
~ Carter Plans Swell Deficit
~ Caribbean Islands Drift to Left
--Selected from Mikey's Funnies.

"When I Say I Am a Christian" When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not shouting "I am saved" I'm whispering "I was lost" That's why I chose this way. When I say ..."I am a Christian" I don't speak of this with pride. I'm confessing that I stumble and need someone to be my guide. When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not trying to be strong. I'm professing that I'm weak and pray for strength to carry on. When I say... "I am a Christian I'm not bragging of success. I'm admitting I have failed and cannot ever pay the debt. When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not claiming to be perfect, My flaws are too visible but, God believes I am worth it. When I say... "I am a Christian" I still feel the sting of pain, I have my share of heartaches which is why I speak His name. When I say... "I am a Christian" I do not wish to judge. I have no authority. I only know I'm loved. --Selected from God@work newsletter, a ministry of St. Mark's United Methodist Church, Lincoln, Nebraska.

--Copyright 1989, Carol S. Wimmer; used by permission.

See Snopes for proper credit to the author of this poem.

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