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Have you got a funny bone or two? Can fun connect with faith? You'd better believe it...."Funny Bone Faith" sees humor--AND faith--in the tough times and with God's help, smiles through tears as it triumphs in a Lord who brings joy and laughter to our lives--daily! Enjoy the fun and inspiration--and strengthen YOUR "Funny Bone Faith" right here--today!
Please note: Humor pieces are meant to be funny - no offense is meant with regard to age, sex, race, religion, occupation or any other topic. It is simply a way of laughing at ourselves; please do not take the humor personal or offensive.
"A merry heart doeth good like a medicine... (Proverbs 17:22)."
"Choir Proficiency Test!"In order to measure your level of proficiency as a choir member, the following test has been carefully developed by experts. Read and reflect on each situation and then select the option that will enhance the quality of the performance.
1. You are entering the choir loft on Sunday morning and suddenly trip and fall down. You should:
a. Assume a kneeling position and break into fervent prayer.
b. Pretend that you've had a heart attack.
c. Crawl into the nearest chair.
d. Begin speaking in Latin.
2. You are a soprano and count incorrectly. As a result you boom out a high "C" one measure too soon. You should:
a. Slide into an inspired "O For a Thousand Tongues to Sing."
b. Look triumphant and hold on to the note.
c. Stop abruptly in mid squawk but keep your lips moving.
d. Sink to the floor in shame.
3. After all those long hard choir rehearsals, you show up twenty minutes late for the Christmas musical. You should:
a. Climb into the back row of the choir from the baptistry.
b. Enter pretending to be a soundman checking cables and then suddenly slip yourself into the choir.
c. Turn the lights out in the church and slip into the choir during the blackout.
d. Read M. Stephen's pamphlet "Techniques for Tardy Appearances."
4. While singing, you discover you have only one page of a two page hymn. You should:
a. Hum for your life.
b. Sing "watermelon, watermelon, watermelon."
c. Try to get another hymnal out of the choir rack with your feet.
d. Sing the first page over again.
5. Inevitably that dreaded big sneeze occurs toward the end of the choir special. You should:
a. As you sneeze, come down hard on your neighbor's foot to create a diversion.
b. Try to make it harmonize.
c. Sneeze into the hair of the choir member in front of you to muffle the noise.
d. Sink to the floor in shame.
Count the number of A's, B's, C's, and D's you checked and find your proficiency rating below:
4 or more A's...there is nothing more you need to know to be a first rate choir member.
4 or more B's...your church choir reflexes are fully developed and you should do well in choir.
4 or more C's...your church choral experience is spotty but your team spirit is on target. You will be an asset to most any choir.
4 or more D's...it is recommended you take soccer or group therapy counseling.
--Selected and adapted from Good Clean Funnies List.
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"Faith Can Move Mountains!"
A small congregation in the foothills of the Great Smokies built a new sanctuary on a piece of land willed to them by a church member. Ten days before the new church was to open, the local building inspector informed the pastor that the parking lot was inadequate for the size of the building. Until the church doubled the size of the parking lot, they would not be able to use the new sanctuary. Unfortunately, the church with its undersized lot had used every inch of their land except for the mountain against which it had been built.
In order to build more parking spaces, they would have to move the mountain out of the back yard. Undaunted, the pastor announced the next Sunday morning that he would meet that evening with all members who had "mountain moving faith." They would hold a prayer session asking God to remove the mountain from the back yard and to somehow provide enough money to have it paved and painted before the scheduled opening dedication service the following week.
At the appointed time, 24 of the congregation's 300 members assembled for prayer. They prayed for nearly three hours. At ten o'clock the pastor said the final "Amen". "We'll open next Sunday as scheduled," he assured everyone. "God has never let us down before, and I believe He will be faithful this time too."
The next morning as he was working in his study there came a loud knock at his door. When he called "come in", a rough looking construction foreman appeared, removing his hard hat as he entered. "Excuse me, Reverend. I'm from Acme Construction Company over in the next county. We're building a huge shopping mall. We need some fill dirt. Would you be willing to sell us a chunk of that mountain behind the church? We'll pay you for the dirt we remove and pave all the exposed area free of charge if we can have it right away. We can't do anything else until we get the dirt in and allow it to settle properly."
The little church was dedicated the next Sunday as originally planned and there were far more members with "mountain moving faith" on opening Sunday than there had been the previous week!
Author Unknown --Author unknown. Found circulating the Net.
Inspiration, News, Devotionals, Humor & More to Start Your Day!
My Pastor's Message of the Day--Updated each weekday!
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Pastor Tim's Clean Laugh List--a daily email humor list
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All Scriptures are taken from the King James Version of the Holy Bible.Humor and inspiration in Tickles 'n Truth are extracted from items that circulate around the Web. Many authors are unknown; I do not claim copyright privileges on the articles used. Should you know the author of a certain piece, please notify me that I may give proper credit.
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Most of the music playing at Peggie's Place originates from Songs of Praise.
Additional (previously named) original source for some midis: Gilberto Barreto.
Visit this great Web site to hear beautiful tunes by many talented artists. CDs are available.
5*-places to visit at Peggie's Place: Tickles 'n Truth . . . The Devotional Buffet
All the rooms at Peggie's Place!
All Scriptures on this website are from the King James Version of The Holy Bible unless otherwise noted.
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Please note that while I strongly adhere to major tenets of the evangelical Christian faith, I may not personally agree with every specific doctrinal belief set forth in other Christian pages.
A safety tip: Internet links and material may include other links and/or material which do not reflect my views or yours, Christian or otherwise. Please choose wisely and use with discretion! And if you find an ugly spider hiding in a dark corner, you may smash it with a broom from my BROOM CLOSET--I hate offensive stuff too!
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--Many quote credits in this series: Mikey's Funnies and/or Walking with Jesus Ministries, unless otherwise sourced or not given.
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